Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
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Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
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if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
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