We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
