Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
