Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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