i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
