You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
