I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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