every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
