and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
