his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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