Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
