This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
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