piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
two words...techno handjob
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
