you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
