speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I need to stop coming to work sober
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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