Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize