K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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