after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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