i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I met the friendliest cop last night
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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