i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
