i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
