Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
sex in a hospital.. check
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
