She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
