we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
