I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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