who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Randomize
