I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
