i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
