I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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