Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize