Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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