It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Randomize