Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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