I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
