Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
