That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize