I didn't shave. On purpose
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
