But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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