He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
They are going to name an STD after you.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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