i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Randomize