How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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