What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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