I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
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