Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
NoShamevember. You game?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
