I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
