if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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