I'm drive I can fine osifer
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
