I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
