you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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