no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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