he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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