It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
